you're my wonderwall.

For Christmas last year, I received some wonderful Christmas presents, but the glace cherry on the Christmas fruitcake for me was two tickets to Ryan Adams & the Cardinals from Brendan.

I utterly adore Ryan Adams (I’m fearful of simply calling him Ryan for fear of further taunting) and I have for years. His albums have been stand out soundtracks to some of the more difficult periods of my life. Cold Roses was the soundtrack to a break up, Love Is Hell is the soundtrack for my ongoing grief, for a period I even preferred lying in bed listening to his albums than talking with my friends. It has to be said, Ryan Adams has been a consistent and loyal companion in times of woe.

In the midst of my month of great upheaval, the impending show was at the back of my mind. It crept up on me very quickly, and before I knew it… it was that very evening. January was a terrible month, plagued with unrest, house hunting, work issues and moments of utter despair. This time, the soundtrack to my drama was Fugazi’s Repeater. I listened to that album on repeat when I was anxious, when i couldn't sleep, whenever I was riding between house inspections and on my way to work. By the end of January, I had moved house and settled into my new home, I had something very important back with me, things had settled at work and life was back to how I like it. Ryan Adams was the perfect closer to a month that tested me. I stood (and sat, and stood again) and was able to enjoy the set without a worry in the back of my mind. No feelings of grief, no woe… just a truckload of happiness and relief.

I’ve been listening to a lot of Ryan Adams in the last few days and it seems the association between him and feelings of sadness is abating, and a new link between his music and feelings of happiness seems to be forming… It has to be said, I’m very fond of the idea of our relationship stepping over to the sunny side of the street.