i'm taking some time out post robbing. i wanted very much to write about this, but it seems i can't even talk about it without crying somewhat.
see you on the other side of my summer holiday.
cmx
Monday, December 29, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
Thursday, December 18, 2008
open letter pt 2
Hi Matt,
I hope this letter finds you well.. You know, not too tired from touring, being awesome etc.
So, I purchased your album even though I had already decided that it “fucking sucked” and that I wasn’t looking forward to your gig. I may have slandered you a little, accused you of selling out and told anyone who would listen just how disappointed I was in you, how you hurt me and made me mad. I got the album because I like complete sets of things, I’m a bit like that.
Matt, I’m really sorry and I was wrong. Your album is amazing and a late runner for my album of 2008. It makes me want to yell along with my best mate, and then punch her in the face, hug her and then drink a beer and kick stuff with her. I like to yell along to it when no one is home and it reminded me that it’s okay to be mad about things that upset me.
The gig last weekend was awesome. It will probably be gig of the year for me even though the “sparkle stalker” was there and making me feel a bit uncomfortable. I had a really great time. I’m still black and blue with bruises but whenever I think about that gig I have a big smile on my face.
I’m sorry Matt, I’ve missed you and your band mates terribly… I was wrong and I can see that. Do you think we could be friends again?
Caseymoira x
I hope this letter finds you well.. You know, not too tired from touring, being awesome etc.
So, I purchased your album even though I had already decided that it “fucking sucked” and that I wasn’t looking forward to your gig. I may have slandered you a little, accused you of selling out and told anyone who would listen just how disappointed I was in you, how you hurt me and made me mad. I got the album because I like complete sets of things, I’m a bit like that.
Matt, I’m really sorry and I was wrong. Your album is amazing and a late runner for my album of 2008. It makes me want to yell along with my best mate, and then punch her in the face, hug her and then drink a beer and kick stuff with her. I like to yell along to it when no one is home and it reminded me that it’s okay to be mad about things that upset me.
The gig last weekend was awesome. It will probably be gig of the year for me even though the “sparkle stalker” was there and making me feel a bit uncomfortable. I had a really great time. I’m still black and blue with bruises but whenever I think about that gig I have a big smile on my face.
I’m sorry Matt, I’ve missed you and your band mates terribly… I was wrong and I can see that. Do you think we could be friends again?
Caseymoira x
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
freudian slip of the year
caseym: thanks so much for the flowers! they are beautiful. take care over the break and have a lovely christmas!
photocopying guy: (as he heads towards the door) i love you too!
yay!
cmx
photocopying guy: (as he heads towards the door) i love you too!
yay!
cmx
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
don't let me know it's christmas time...
I’m normally a bit of a Grinch around this time of year and not without good reason.
My mum was married to a bodybuilder for a few years and he managed to destroy Christmas with his steroid fed anger. Seriously. This usually resulted in tears, charred meat on the barbeque and a lot of slamming of doors. Mum would be crying, John would be red faced with his mega arms flailing and I’d just be standing there with Abby shaking my head and muttering under my breath something about next year it being her family’s turn to take us.
Mum would also make this epic deal out of Christmas, inviting loads of people around and insisting on catering for everyone. The days leading up to Christmas would be tense. Mum would be in the kitchen until two am making, mixing, caking and cursing. Hours would be spent in Safeway shopping, waiting, shoplifting (that would be me) and swearing. It was a pretty scary time. My mother would be so volatile that I would not go into the kitchen or the surrounding areas for fear of her manic, stressed outbursts. Rather than eat well, I would snack on my shoplifted snacks in my bedroom, sneak out my window for some fresh air and spend a lot of time in the bathroom doing what I guessed girls did in there. Hiding from my mother due to THE FEAR*
Christmas is a period of immense, unnecessary stress, and I still very much stand by this.
The carols stress me, the summer tv guide stresses me, the shopping stresses me, the people stress me. Christmas brings out the fuckwit and I have a low tolerance of the fuckwit.
About a month ago, my Mum asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said “to be left alone, for just one day. I just want to read in bed, drink tea and ride up to Pete’s place in the arvo for a beer.” Normally, this would upset her, she’d make this big deal about how Christmas is family time and she would be devastated to not see me. I was ready for it, I had worked out how to justify it to her and get her to come around to the idea of Boxing Day dinner, near my house, at somewhere I like to eat. Mum’s response was “Okay, that’s fine with me… It even makes things easier. We’ll come to yours with Jesse (rad step brother) on Boxing Day for dinner. WIN! I was speechless!
So I am getting exactly what I want this Christmas! Peace & quiet and the opportunity to do as I please. I’m a little nervous… It’s a bit of time to fill. The only downside I can see is that I don’t have any shoplifted snacks, and I’m currently struggling with the book I am reading. Both of these, I can work on in the coming days. Is this shaping up to be the greatest Christmas ever? We’ll just have to wait and see. I know it’ll be without THE FEAR* and that can only be a good thing.
Cmx
* THE FEAR is a feeling I get in the back of my neck when I know my mum is stressed and close to snapping at the closest family member. My neck tingles and tenses up. It’s like a built in warning system telling me to “stay the fuck away at all costs.”
My mum was married to a bodybuilder for a few years and he managed to destroy Christmas with his steroid fed anger. Seriously. This usually resulted in tears, charred meat on the barbeque and a lot of slamming of doors. Mum would be crying, John would be red faced with his mega arms flailing and I’d just be standing there with Abby shaking my head and muttering under my breath something about next year it being her family’s turn to take us.
Mum would also make this epic deal out of Christmas, inviting loads of people around and insisting on catering for everyone. The days leading up to Christmas would be tense. Mum would be in the kitchen until two am making, mixing, caking and cursing. Hours would be spent in Safeway shopping, waiting, shoplifting (that would be me) and swearing. It was a pretty scary time. My mother would be so volatile that I would not go into the kitchen or the surrounding areas for fear of her manic, stressed outbursts. Rather than eat well, I would snack on my shoplifted snacks in my bedroom, sneak out my window for some fresh air and spend a lot of time in the bathroom doing what I guessed girls did in there. Hiding from my mother due to THE FEAR*
Christmas is a period of immense, unnecessary stress, and I still very much stand by this.
The carols stress me, the summer tv guide stresses me, the shopping stresses me, the people stress me. Christmas brings out the fuckwit and I have a low tolerance of the fuckwit.
About a month ago, my Mum asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said “to be left alone, for just one day. I just want to read in bed, drink tea and ride up to Pete’s place in the arvo for a beer.” Normally, this would upset her, she’d make this big deal about how Christmas is family time and she would be devastated to not see me. I was ready for it, I had worked out how to justify it to her and get her to come around to the idea of Boxing Day dinner, near my house, at somewhere I like to eat. Mum’s response was “Okay, that’s fine with me… It even makes things easier. We’ll come to yours with Jesse (rad step brother) on Boxing Day for dinner. WIN! I was speechless!
So I am getting exactly what I want this Christmas! Peace & quiet and the opportunity to do as I please. I’m a little nervous… It’s a bit of time to fill. The only downside I can see is that I don’t have any shoplifted snacks, and I’m currently struggling with the book I am reading. Both of these, I can work on in the coming days. Is this shaping up to be the greatest Christmas ever? We’ll just have to wait and see. I know it’ll be without THE FEAR* and that can only be a good thing.
Cmx
* THE FEAR is a feeling I get in the back of my neck when I know my mum is stressed and close to snapping at the closest family member. My neck tingles and tenses up. It’s like a built in warning system telling me to “stay the fuck away at all costs.”
Monday, December 8, 2008
nat graf.
dear nat,
if only this blog could be as awesome as you. happy birthday.
love, caseymoira x
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
oerohiaerohip34drgahion;adrg
i know i'm at my self-censoring best when my sent items contains 5 one line messages and my drafts folder holds 32 messages containing some of my finest, most hilarious and awful work to date.
when i'm at my worst - i really am at my best.
cmx
when i'm at my worst - i really am at my best.
cmx
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